Friday, February 13, 2009

Starting the adoption process...

So we had our first informative meeting on the adoption process and it is scary! There are so many options and this was just one agency! For Domestic adoption in the state of Indiana if the birth mom has a normal delivery she has 24 hours afterwards to sign the papers. If she has a c-section she has 48. After that she signs off but for the next 30 days she can still contest and try to gain custody back; but at that point the courts are involved. That is scary for the adoptive party in the situation. And since nothing ever goes smoothly for us that would probably be us…Also during the process you may have to pay for health care costs for the birth mom; if she chooses not to go through with it you could be out that money too…
We are now considering International which means some time out of the country and bigger expenses. Now Lilly gives $10,000 and my work gives $5000 but if we go out of the country that opens up a whole new can of worms. The children are older when you go out of the country and you are never 100% sure of the care they received. I will have to go back to work, after my leave, and you possibly get into issues with attachment disorders and such. So I came home crying and scared of the whole process right now. Nate of course takes everything in stride but it is overwhelming to me and there are still more agencies we need to check out because if we do go out of the country we want to know all our options. I know that it is the agency’s responsibility to give you all the facts, good and bad, but it is scary thinking about it. I know pregnancy on its own has risks and scares and you never know what will happen that way either but this seems to be such an emotional rollercoaster and there are many possible things to go wrong…Could be I am a worrywart to begin with but I just have to prepare emotionally for this. Honestly when it is something you want so badly any paths off course are worrisome. Please keep us in your prayers that God’s path is very clear and maybe even lined with bright lights pointing the way. I heard this poem years ago and really liked it, I think of it often; it was actually part of my quiet time today of all things.

Chance has not bought this ill to me;
It’s God’s own hand, so let it be,
For HE sees what I cannot see.
There is a purpose for each pain,
And He one day will make it plain
That earthly loss is heavenly gain.
Like as a piece of tapestry
Viewed from the back appears to be
Only threads tangled hopelessly;
But in the front a picture fair
Rewards the worker for his care,
Proving his skill and patience rare.
You are the Workman, I am the frame.
Lord, for the glory of Your Name,
Perfect Your image on the same.


Amber said...

Oh Rach, I'm so excited for you guys and will definitely keep you both and the little one God has planned for you in my prayers. i pray that God will give you the emotional strength and the financially capabilities to pursue a little "Fairchild". We love you guys and please keep us posted on everything! And also, I'm really still liking the chunky bag and that very same fabric so let me know how you want me to pursue that order with you!

To Germany...and Beyond! said...

Wow! I never realized how much was really involved. You guys are definitely in our prayers. We pray that God would bring the right child to you, and that he would give you peace throughout the entire process. Keep us posted!

Mrs.Dawn Amber said...

I will keep you and Nate in my prayers. God sure has a plan and I will pray that you will be able to see it very clearly and that He would give you strength through the whole process. Remember Philipians 4:13--I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Love ya.

Let me know what that fabric looks like, i'm thinking it would be really cool to get a messenger type bag, with a front flap, but only if your up for the challenge. Talk to you soon my friend.